King Ass Manifesto

Latest Theories....

2007-04-26T12:01:00.000-05:00

Clayton is yammering on about the Lions taking CJ and continuing to talk with the yucs. The yucs will then take Gaines Adams at 4 and probably try some sort of Eli Manning type trade. The Browns are gonna take Quinn at 3 so that hurts the yucs chances of trading down. Lots of intrique this year indeed, maybe mckay will set the falcons back 5 years and trade his next two entire drafts to the Lions. The real question though is, how is Matt Millen gonna screw this up? Draft CJ and get stuck with him, as he blows out his left nut on the way to the podium? It all don't matter though cause Big Al is gonna have his revenge on da league...

J.E.T.S.. JETS!..JETS!..JETS!!!

2007-04-25T19:08:00.000-05:00

I can't let this pass without posting for posterity, and this little montage isn't even the half of it. I'm doin the pilgrimage to New York next year, with or without you fuckers!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rZxNeFLuY98

Lets get to the Meat of the matter...

2007-04-23T20:21:00.000-05:00

NFL.com writeups of da meat..

http://www.nfl.com/draft/analysis/expert/brandt/dl

http://www.nfl.com/draft/analysis/expert/brandt/ol

If Gruallen were smart it would be:

Trade down with whoever, get extra 2nd rounder. Then move up to late first.

1) Grab Levi Brown, OT Penn state
1b) Grab Jarvis Moss, DE, Florida
2b) Grab Ray Mcdonald, DT, Florida
3) Grab Marcus Thomas, DT, Florida

Trade Simms for the Raider's next 15 years worth of 7th round picks. (Will be essentially late 6th round picks after Simms works his majic)

Trade Simeon Rice for Lions OT Backus

Build new stadium next to the Port of Tampa Bay to facilitate influx of fresh meat.

Offer Russ Grimm 5 mill a year, ship him to the Somoan Islands and startup a bucs recruiting and offensive line training camp. Spare no expense making this operation the flagship training facility of da league, complete with 24 hr catering, multi-level hot tubs and self hydrating mud bog.

You can learn alot from a Fat Guy on a moped.

2007-04-21T10:18:00.000-05:00

More Bucs Babble!!!!

2007-04-20T09:23:00.000-05:00

From GBN Report: No way the yucs luck out into unloading Rice and getting CJ. I say the yucs trade the farm to Al to move up, then CJ strains his left nut putting on the #1 jersey and is out for the year. Could be worse though, any of you dudes see the article on Cleavelands #1 picks and free agent aquisitions over the past few years? http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=2843540

More Bucs’ babble, etc, etc… After literally months in which there was barely a buzz around the NFL, the league’s rumor mill is really starting to heat up with just 9 days to go before the draft. And Tampa Bay seems to be at the center of most of the action. According to an earlier report, the Buccaneers had talked with Oakland about a big deal involving the #1 pick in this year’s draft. Later reports have the Buccaneers working on a deal with the Lions, who would supposedly give up the second pick in the draft for the fourth overall selection and veteran DE Simeon Rice. Tampa Bay is believed to want to land Georgia Tech WR Clvin Johnson who is expected to be atken with either the first or second picks this year. Meanwhile, there have also been rumors that Arizona, which has the 5th pick overall, will make a push to move up in order to select Wisconsin DE Joe Thomas.

gbn report speculation

2007-04-18T11:51:00.000-05:00

I think all this is a ploy to confuse Al Davis as to which is the best way to shaft the yucs. Draft CJ himself and risk the yucs trading down in the draft from 4th overall for more picks to rebuild the struggling yucs franchise, or take all the yucs day one picks this year and hope CJ blows out his knee on the way to the podium. Man i love this shit, if this works out right me and smoosher could be taking the Dodge Neon on a joy ride to chicago after the first pick.

April 18
(10:00 AM): Bucs want Tech WR; willing to deal?? There has been something of a buzz around the NFL the past day or so with rumors that Tampa Bay desperately wants to move up in this next weekend’s draft in order to acquire star Georgia Tech WR Calvin Johnson. Indeed, the Bucs are so enamored with the 6-4, 240-pound Johnson, who also runs a 4.35 40, that reportedly willing to part with all four of their first day picks at the 2007 draft. The Buccaneers currently have the 4th pick overall, along with a second rounder – the 35th pick – and two third rounders, the 64th and 68th picks. There is no question that Tampa Bay head coach Jon Gruden likes Johnson. There is also no question that Bucs’ G.M. Bruce Allen was in contact with Oakland owner Al Davis a week or so ago, although little has been revealed about what was said between the two. Tampa Bay also sent a full contingent, including QB Chris Simms to a private meeting with Johnson in Atlanta last week in Atlanta. At the same time, the cynical observer has to ask if all of this makes a whole lot of sense. While Johnson is a tremendous prospect, in fact, there are NFL scouts who describe him as the best pure physical talent to come out in the past decade, there are still no guarantees come draft day, especially at a position like WR. As well, given that it is widely assumed that Oakland likely is more likely to take LSU Jamarcus Russell with the #1 pick overall, then it would be a lot cheaper for the Buccaneers to trade up with Detroit which has the second pick overall, but is known to want to deal out of that spot. At the same time, while Gruden and the Bucs want to win right away and Johnson might help in that regard, Tampa Bay is a team with a ton of holes; indeed, the Buccaneers may have more immediate roster problems than any team in the league. It also should be noted that while the package of picks the Buccaneers have reportedly offered the Raiders sounds like a lot, according to the commonly accepted NFL trade value chart, the 4 Buccaneers picks still don’t equal the value of the #1 pick overall; in fact, in order to make a move up to the #1 spot, the Buccaneers would ultimately likely have to give up their 2008 first rounder. There is also some irony in the fact that the Buccaneers are in their current predicament, at least in part because they gave up so many draft picks as compensation for the signing of Gruden away from the Raiders, not that all this picks have done much for Oakland. It is also possible, if there is any truth to the above scenario, that before the Raiders move out of the #1 spot, in effect passing on the chance to grab LSU’s Russell, they would need to have acquired a veteran QB. And that has folks speculating that Oakland may be poised to pounce on Miami QB Daunte Culpepper if, as expected, he is released by the Dolphins. Stay tuned.

Phish woes...

2007-04-17T09:54:00.000-05:00

http://www.miamiherald.com/614/story/75289.html

So yucs could trade the farm to Al, or wait for the phish to trade them the farm. Oh how i miss deangelo, with all those phish picks we could rebuild the defense in one year. Not so with Gruallen though, CJ here we come!

Filthy Obnoxious Flim Critic

2006-07-03T21:43:00.000-05:00

http://www.bigempire.com/filthy/

This dude is freakin awesome!! A total jerk, just how i like my film critics! Ranks right up there with www.sportspickle.com. Here are some of his finer moments

'A turd so lazy it missed the bowl'
'A huge turd, totally worthless.'
'Horseshit sprinkled with saccharine.'
'A mammoth, foul turd.'
'Lifeless, soulless crapfest'

Any man who relies so heavily on the word 'turd' must have some serious unrealized potential. Cheer's to unrealized potential!

Motivation is the American way

2006-07-01T22:29:00.000-05:00

If you remove the 'K' from 'monkey' you get 'money'. I just thought you should know. And Havanna Clubs aren't that bad once you get past the first one....

Beer Run Tokyo Style

2006-06-19T10:56:00.000-05:00

http://news.scotsman.com/latest.cfm?id=890332006

They do this in Gainesville, FL all the time

Yucs Illustrious History

2006-06-18T17:23:00.000-05:00

http://www.bucpower.com/1983history.html

Man this is a damm good site. A writeup of every season during the yucs dark ages. A must visit for every deprived yucs fan! Heathen fans can only dream of such futility, past superbowls non-withstanding...

Bucco Bruce Lives!!!

2006-06-18T10:18:00.000-05:00

What can you say? There is no arguing with perfection!

Here's a link to a fellow yucs fan with no life...
http://pewterpirates.blogspot.com/

This is cool....

2006-06-18T09:54:00.000-05:00

in a really deprived sort of way. Ok lets get started here. Today i woke up and scratched my ass. It felt good so i did it again. Then i had the assinine idea of toying around with a blog. Such are the humble origins of the King Ass Manifesto.